This morning they weans had me up at 6.30am. I suppse thats what I get for putting them to bed at 6.30 last night so I could lie and enjoy my migraine in peace and quiet. I knew that bacon and brie sandwich fae Obriens wisney a good idea. Brie. Somebody asked me what Brie is and I said its a type of cheese. “Awright, cheese give me migraines!” they said. Aye, it gies me migraines as well but I had forgot about that until they reminded me…..i ate the fucken thing anyway.
Bacon and Brie sandwhich fur £3.95. £3.95? Thats a Happy Meal fae McDonalds wi an extra burger and chips. Or, as I usually get, exta chips and a plain sunday to dip the chips in (sick?)…. pure fucken bruilliant.
Anywie, so av been in a cunt tae a mood aw morning.
Zool- no far aff!
A heard the close cleaners oot cleaning the close anaw. Noo, everycunt in this close paies an extra £8 fae their housing benefit to these cunts, so they never see it. Except I pay these cunts out oot ma ain money….oot ma ain fucken money. And I could dae a better fucken joab masel if a stuck a dead dug oan the end of a stick, dipped it in pish and mopped the stairs.
This could work
So a fucken burst oot ma door ready to ask them if they needed a fucken haun or did they wahnt tae bend me oor every week for the money to ‘clean’ the close, when I saw, what I can only describe as the mirror image of myself stauning. A didn’y have the heart to have a go at the poor lassie. So a left it and went in and kicked fuck oot the cat.
Fuck. Sake.
arse kicked for hotlinking! nae joy!
DS
constructive. thanks!
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhah x 10000
Dip a dead dog in pish – Wahahahahah. Still laughing the now, while I’m typing.
I love your Zool comparison. Love it. I’ve never really thought about what I’m like when I go psycho. Probably a bit Regan from the Excorcist mixed with Rambo and a wee touch of Michael Myers. Pure cow in other words.
Hope you’re feelin better now. We had the daft one-week-later-than-everyone-elses’s Halloween party for the weans last night. Will blog about it later.
Aw ta Fiona, glad you laughed. I get a bit paranoid that nobody is getting me haha. The dead dog thing is a true comparison. After they clean the close the place is covered in DOG hairs….it smells like dog as well, but here is the thing, nobody in our close has a dog. Maybe they ARE using a dog… :O who knows.
I had a better picture of Zool. It actually took me ages and ages to find, then the bold Stillie informed me that the image had been pulled and a snidy wee comment about Hotlinking was there. Fannys. So we’ll go with that for now. I also looked for a good picture of Linda Blair in the film “Repossessed” the “Exorcist” comedy spoof with Lesley Neilsen.
Canny wait to read about your party. lolz
Zool & dead dogs, comedy gold!
Even my voice goes like Regan’s when I’m mad.
‘Your mother sucks cocks in hell!!!!’